What to expect when dating Swedish men?

So, how is dating up there in Sweden? Every time I talk to people back home in Spain about the wonders of Sweden and how great is living and studying here, that’s their first question. Important things first, right?

Naturally, if you are single in your mid-20s and planning to spend at least the next two years of your life in Sweden, you better prepare yourself and learn the rules of dating here.

Luckily, my friends and I have done some research for you, so without further ado, here is what to expect when dating Swedish men. (This doesn’t mean that all of them are the same … just every single one we have ever dated …)

* The easiest (and almost only) places to flirt with Swedes are nightclubs or parties. In these environments, and with the help of their good friend alcohol, they become kind of talkative.

* Swedes are shy. You will have to be the one approaching them.

* They don’t know how to dance, so the dance floor approach might not be the best method.

* If the party was good enough and you come back home with a phone number, you should text first. Waiting for a Swede to text will just infuriate you.

* Swedes (unsurprisingly) “act like a Swede”. This is actually a common expression in Spain. It means “pretending not to hear you and avoiding you instead”. I never knew why we used it … until I experienced it myself. So even if you both had a great time, you might not get an answer EVER. I have talked about this with many Swedes and they all told me that it is a social convention to avoid putting rejection into words.

* If they answer you, your first date will probably be going for fika. At this point you should know what fika is, but in this context it is an ambiguous meeting that may or may not be a date, or a non-date, or a date-pretending-not-to-be-a-date, where you will ask each other typical questions and probably end up talking about how bad the accommodation situation is in Stockholm.

* The fika situation will probably last a few weeks. If the two of you decide to take the next step, you’ll probably go out for dinner. Then you can call it a date.

* At dinner, remember that you are in a very equal country, so don’t expect him to pay. Expect to split the bill.

* Swedes are not affectionate. (I have a friend who waited two years until her Swedish boyfriend told her “I love you”).

* Not all of them descend from the Vikings and are tall, blonde and incredibly handsome … but most of them are.

But girls, do not lose faith. If you cannot handle Swedes remember that this city is full of international students!

2 thoughts on “What to expect when dating Swedish men?

  1. Hi Alex, it is just my personal opinion as you just said, and I tried to made that clear in the beginning saying that not all Swedes are like this, just the ones I have met, and I have also met really nice Swedes and couples with beautiful stories. I am sorry if you felt offended about it, I apologize. This was intended to be a funny post about some Swedish cliches.

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